Connie St. James

Do you ever feel alone and overwhelmed when facing life decisions? This could involve a relationship, your work/career, the aging process, or anything else that creates anxiety and stress for you. I can help. Of course, you will want to know my educational and licensing background: I received a Batchelor’s degree in Psychology from California State University, Northridge in 1987 and a Master’s degree in Marriage, Family and Child Therapy in 1989 from California Family Study Center (now known as Phillips Graduate University). After completing a 3000-hour internship, I took my state written and oral examinations and, in 1992, I received my license from the State of California as a Marriage and Family Therapist. You will also want to know my counseling background: During my internship, I worked with clients who expressed dissatisfaction with parts of their lives and a desire to make their lives better. Most of their discontent was due to problems in various types of personal and work-related relationships, and we worked together to alleviate feelings of anxiety and stress. During my internship, I also spent some time training in a psychiatric hospital setting, in a drug/alcohol abuse center and in a facility for abused children. Once my internship was completed, I had a small private practice in West Los Angeles. Eventually, I met my now-husband, moved to Palm Desert, and had a small private practice there until we moved to Santa Barbara. In addition to a private practice in Palm Desert I worked in a hospital there facilitating groups which focused on issues with major depression. My husband’s work took us to Santa Barbara, and I changed my license status to inactive so I could help him in his business. After five years in Santa Barbara, my husband retired, and we moved to Auburn in Northern California where I worked for over twenty years in real estate. Although I did not work as a counselor since we moved from Palm Desert, I continued to rely on my education and experience as a counselor in both my personal and work-related relationships. In addition, I have used those tools as I have faced my own aging process. Now that I am in my own “winter years,” I have had a strong desire to be of help once again to people who want to make their lives better. I am confident that my 60+ years of life experience along with my education and previous counseling experience give me what is needed to help others with their relationship issues, motivation, self-esteem, confidence, and coping with life changes. Finally, you will want to know what my approach to counseling is: I rely on a combination of Person-Centered, Cognitive, and Behavioral theories. I am patient, empathic, and non-judgmental. My objective is to create a safe space where you can discover how to make your life better. Together, we will work on defining and understanding “your story.” You will provide the content by telling me “your story.” What is working. What isn’t working. Your goals. Your expectations for counseling. Your story will include your joy, your sadness, your anger, and your fear. I will focus on your feelings as well as your thoughts and your behaviors so we can figure out how these things may contribute to your unhappiness, disappointments, frustrations, and life dissatisfaction. I will help you identify feelings that you can’t. I will help you identify any detrimental thoughts and behaviors. Sometimes I will ask for clarification to make sure I understand. Sometimes I will probe to help expand the content of “your story” and help you edit it as needed to create clarity. You will decide if/when your goals change and when counseling should come to an end. Although ‘your story’ will continually change throughout all your life, you will decide when you are ready to work on “your story” on your own. When that time comes, you will let me know so that we can start the process of ending our work together. I will tailor our work together so that it meets your unique and specific needs. Taking the first step to sign up for therapy can take courage and I am proud of you for getting started! I look forward to joining you for a little while on your journey to a happier, more contented life.